Pompeii

Starring: Kit Harington, Emily Browning, Kiefer Sutherland, Jared Harris, Carrie-Anne Moss, Adewale Akinnuoye-Agbaje, Jessica Lucas
Directed by Paul W.S. Anderson
Rating: PG-13
Genre: Action, Adventure, Drama
2014

Times Seen:
Tim: 1

Summary: A gladiator (Kit Harington) falls in love with a noblewoman (Emily Browning) in the days before the volcanic eruption at Pompeii.

Review:

Tim: I really, really wanted to like Pompeii. I'm a big fan of disaster movies, and I love the idea of a disaster movie set in 79 A.D. I'm also a huge "Game of Thrones" fan, so I was excited to see Kit Harington take the lead in a big budget Hollywood movie. "Lost" is my favorite TV show of all time, so I was pumped to see Adewale Akinnuoye-Agbaje. Unfortunately, director Paul W.S. Anderson delivers a terrible movie. There was no way I could feel even marginally excited about the crap final product that sucked out 105 minutes of my life. This is an all-around bad movie.

Perhaps the most egregious sin is that this film completely and totally ripped off large portions of Gladiator. It felt like the writers popped that far better film in and then translated most of the cool scenes into lower quality versions here- we have the white, proud gladiator as the protagonist. He becomes friends with a black gladiator who's lost his family. The gladiators are supposed to reenact a famous battle, but the upstart gladiators work effectively as a team, pulling off the upset and breaking with how the story was supposed to end. The Roman representative dictates whether to kill the gladiators, but the crowd come to his aid. I sat in befuddlement as I saw scene after scene completely copied over from Gladiator. I have no idea how the writers thought they could get away with this, but it's an atrocious act. They should have tried to come up with something original (although if the rest of the movie is any indication, they don't have the least bit of talent).

The rest of the movie is completely generic. It follows a paint-by-numbers story. There's the star-crossed lovers, one a slave and the other a nobleman's daughter. There is the treacherous high-ranking official who wants the girl for himself. It's all been done numerous times before and no one in this film seemed to show any desire to try something new or different. Everyone felt completely comfortable telling the same old story again (albeit significantly less effectively). The dialogue is atrocious. I actually laughed out loud several times because of the inane, moronic utterings of one character or another. It was painful to watch on screen. The story is also very predictable- from the opening to right before the end (I admit I wasn't totally sure how the story would end).

The special effects are decent. It was fun to see the massive Mt. Vesuvius erupt on screen, throwing lava, ash, etc. all over Pompeii. While it was fun to see an ancient city destroyed (in a fiction setting, of course), I was a little disappointed in the depiction of the eruption. I don't believe it was shown as effectively as it could have been. Too many allowances were made for the characters to have time to run around, fight, save each other, etc. By the time the big one comes, the movie is nearly over and interest has long since run out.

The cast was lackluster. I like Kit Harington because he plays Jon Snow on TV, but the guy is shockingly wooden. I thought that was due to the role, but he delivers another performance here, completely devoid of charisma. I'm glad he spent so much time working on his abs (they are impressive), but maybe he should have spent some of that time taking acting lessons. He makes for a boring protagonist. Emily Browning has talent, but it is not on display here. She's hampered by the awful script and comes across looking skilly. Kiefer Sutherland delivers a one-note performance that only serves as a caricature of an actual human being. Jared Harris and Carrie-Anne Moss get off slightly better, maybe because their roles are so small. Adewale Akinnuoye-Agbaje was one of the better cast members, but he's hampered by the fact that his character was done far better by Djimon Hounsou in Gladiator. As a whole, the cast didn't do much for me.

I have to place the largest amount of blame on director Paul W.S. Anderson. It's becoming more and more apparent that the man has no idea how to make a legitimately good movie. Anyone can get lucky once in a while, but he's shown a long track record of delivering mediocre films. I wish that people would stop giving him work, because it's almost always a bitter disappointment. Pompeii is a film that could have been excellent. Instead, it's a total mess. Whenever I see his name now, it's going to elicit a gigantic groan. If there was ever any hope of him salvaging a decent career, it's beyond dead now. The guy is a hack, and he ruined a film with great potential.

Rating 1-10
Tim's Rating: 5



If You Enjoyed This Movie, We Recommend: Gladiator, Resident Evil